An Equal Match

At last night’s bible study on 1^st Corinthians, we discussed chapter 7 about marriage and virginity. This topic is very important lately. Marriage is under attack on so many fronts. Whether it is from serial divorce or same sex marriage, our society is suffering from a lack of sacredness in relationships. Last night’s session was timely.

What seems to be missing in marriage today is the understanding of equality between spouses. In marriage the husband and wife do not have total control over their own bodies. They must consult the other in life choices. Neither has the rights over the other, or over themselves exclusively. In today’s reading from Ephesians, we hear some advice from Saint Paul.

Brethren, husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. Even so husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no man ever hates his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body. “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This mystery is a profound one, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church; however, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

Ephesians 5.25-33

This is the second half of the reading used during every Orthodox wedding service. In today’s reading Saint Paul is reminding men of their serious responsibility to their wives. In this example of sacrificial love, a husband is an example of Christ in marriage. A husband who loves his wife as Christ loves the Church would never abuse her, he would never subjugate her, he would never abandon her, he would never disrespect her.

So long as the husband hold us his end of the bargain, a wife can safely and without worry be subject to him and respect him. He cares only about her salvation. She cares only about his salvation. This is true equality in marriage.

Equality in marriage isn’t about chores. Equality in marriage isn’t about who stays home to raise the children. Equality isn’t even about who makes the money to pay the bills. Equality in marriage is about each spouse wanting the other spouse to be in heaven, and willing to do what is needed to get EACH OTHER there. Too bad our society doesn’t care about real equality in marriage.